Monday, September 28, 2009

No Promises

Wow......so it's coming up on 2 years now that I started writing this thing and here I sit...same computer...same keyboard, same view out on the back yard, and same ME. Still the same father, with two little girls (bigger now), a beautiful wife (pregnant now, fingers crossed for a boy), that wants to do better. It's a feeling that never goes away. That always feeling just a little bit uncomfortable with how you look. My self confidence still kept in check by my self image. It's eerie to look back on the posts that I wrote that long ago and see how much of it still holds true. The more things change the more they stay the same, right? I sort of feel like I was just paying lip service to everyone that was reading. It's like deep down I knew that "Hey, you're still you, even when you write all these fancy words. You're still going to give up the chase at some point, right? Isn't that what you've always done?" I know I know...........crappy attitude, but pretty much right on.
I never wanted to be that guy. The one that starts a blog only to drift away unnoticed a few months later. I figured this writing and people reading would bring me back, you know, keep me motivated and accountable. In the end it didn't, and I'm bummed about that when I think about it, because there were a lot of good people that I was keeping up with that I'm sure are gone now. It really was neat to gain a little glimpse into each of their lives, and to share a little of mine. Well all I can say is that I hope they all succeeded in their quests for fitness, and that hopefully this will be my last hoorah. The one that starts the snowball at the top of the mountain, just the tiny spec that will continue to roll down the hill of life picking up speed and......where am I going with this. Bad analogy, the snowball gets bigger and bigger, when I just want to get smaller and smaller.
See what happens when you don't post in 2 years, you ramble. What brought this on is that I started P90X today, and I'm excited. I'm pretty sure that 90% of the world has completed their first rotation of this workout series, but better late than never is what I always say. I'm going to try to chronicle my little journey here. No promises, but we'll see. UNTIL NEXT TIME......