After reading over my "HELLO, HERE I AM" post from yesterday, I've decided that it sounds a bit overly dramatic. I guess it was just the mood I happened to be in last night. To be honest, I'm just really excited to have found this. I just commented on Billy's last post hoping that I'll be added to F.A.T. so that I can become part of the group.
Reading what I just wrote sounds a little presumptuous of me, doesn't it. I don't know if it's really that easy or not. I guess it should be. I mean if I were running some sort of support group I'd let most anybody in, so long as they qualified to be part of the group. Can somebody enlighten me as to what the "CC&R's" are here. Are there any ground rules that a newbie should be aware of. It sort of seems like a posting free-for-all and everyone just kind of chimes in on everyone elses thoughts. That sounds like just what I need. I've never been a part of a support group that kept each other on task, and I think the accountability will keep me in line.
Anyway, I can guarantee that my posts won't be as thought provoking or insightful as some of yours, but I'd still love to give this a whirl.
Until next time....................
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Monday, October 29, 2007
Once Apon A Time.....
I was an "athlete". Good enough to play 4 years of Varsity Basketball in High School. Good enough to have most of my college education paid for on a Baseball scholarship. Somewhere between then and now my body has digressed. I've been married to a beautiful woman for about 4 years, and we have 2 wonderful daughters. A 3 year old and a 3 month old. Like many of you whose posts I've read (btw....you're all the reason I have the courage to openly talk about the issues I have) I too have tried many of the fad diets hoping against hope that the "Newest Best" one would be the one to stick. I guess I'm stating the obvious when I say my being here, blogging of all things, shows that none of them have.
My story is very similar to many of the ones I've been reading online. I've always felt like the chubby kid, or the fat friend. In reading Billy's (of Billy's Lean Body Quest blog) thoughts on the "inner fat" that we all share, I realize that many of my thoughts were just that.....the inner fat talking. Looking back at pictures of times when I know that I thought I was the fat one now makes me laugh, shockingly enough I appear to be normal. Maybe its the fact that I've always had somewhat of a Ghetto Booty and that insecurity has turned into a feeling of being fat all over. Whatever the underlying thoughts were, and however funny those "fat" pictures may be now, I'm definitely in a place now where I need to take my body seriously. I guess you could say the my inner fat became a self fulfilling prophecy. As I write this here are my stats... 6'5" tall, 278 lbs, 42 inch waist, and 33% body fat.
The reason that I'm doing this is mainly to keep myself accountable to SOMETHING. I've started and stopped so many times I cannot remember, and I always look back at wasted time and regret not sticking with it. I don't have a detailed plan as of today but I hope in the coming days and weeks that I will build one that I can stick to. I want to do this for my wife, to become the man she married once again, she deserves it. I want to do this for my daughters to show them that not everything in life is going to come easy, but if you work hard enough, that you can achieve what seems unattainable. I want to do this for my Mom, Dad, and Sister, because we've all struggled with these issues for a long time now, and I want to inspire them to push harder towards the success I know they can achieve. Most of all I want to do this for me. If it makes any sense.....I'm THRU with being sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm a good person with a good heart who genuinely cares about others, but for a long time I've been turning a blind eye to my own problems with weight. For a long time I've had this self image in my head that is actually quite fit, until I see myself in a mirror or a reflection in a window reveals the truth. It's not muscle.....it's fat. I want today to mark the beginning of my journey.
The start of every marathon begins with 1 step........... I think I've just taken it. Thank you all for inspiring me to do better.
My story is very similar to many of the ones I've been reading online. I've always felt like the chubby kid, or the fat friend. In reading Billy's (of Billy's Lean Body Quest blog) thoughts on the "inner fat" that we all share, I realize that many of my thoughts were just that.....the inner fat talking. Looking back at pictures of times when I know that I thought I was the fat one now makes me laugh, shockingly enough I appear to be normal. Maybe its the fact that I've always had somewhat of a Ghetto Booty and that insecurity has turned into a feeling of being fat all over. Whatever the underlying thoughts were, and however funny those "fat" pictures may be now, I'm definitely in a place now where I need to take my body seriously. I guess you could say the my inner fat became a self fulfilling prophecy. As I write this here are my stats... 6'5" tall, 278 lbs, 42 inch waist, and 33% body fat.
The reason that I'm doing this is mainly to keep myself accountable to SOMETHING. I've started and stopped so many times I cannot remember, and I always look back at wasted time and regret not sticking with it. I don't have a detailed plan as of today but I hope in the coming days and weeks that I will build one that I can stick to. I want to do this for my wife, to become the man she married once again, she deserves it. I want to do this for my daughters to show them that not everything in life is going to come easy, but if you work hard enough, that you can achieve what seems unattainable. I want to do this for my Mom, Dad, and Sister, because we've all struggled with these issues for a long time now, and I want to inspire them to push harder towards the success I know they can achieve. Most of all I want to do this for me. If it makes any sense.....I'm THRU with being sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm a good person with a good heart who genuinely cares about others, but for a long time I've been turning a blind eye to my own problems with weight. For a long time I've had this self image in my head that is actually quite fit, until I see myself in a mirror or a reflection in a window reveals the truth. It's not muscle.....it's fat. I want today to mark the beginning of my journey.
The start of every marathon begins with 1 step........... I think I've just taken it. Thank you all for inspiring me to do better.
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